Ask B: I Didn’t Receive an “And Guest”



Dear B, 

I’ve been invited to a wedding, but didn’t receive an “and guest.” I’m not seeing anyone special and there will be other single people there, however I would still like to bring someone with me to the wedding. Can I call the bride and ask if I may bring a date? 

Dateless Darling

My Darling D,
While I completely understand that you would prefer to attend the wedding with a date, I recommend that you respect the bride and groom’s wishes. If they did not “and guest” you, they have a reason – space limitations, budget, etc., so I advise that you refrain from calling the bride-to-be. Instead, attend the wedding solo as your fabulous self, for the new Mr. and Mrs. will be so honored to have you there. And who knows, you might meet a dashing suitor on the dance floor!

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  1. Hi Mrs. Buns,

    What if it is an out of town wedding and you DO have a long-term significant other? These days there aren’t many single friends to buddy up with, and if there are they may be otherwise pre-occupied as bridesmaids, etc. I’m more likely to make the trip if I can bring my significant other, thoughts? xoxo

  2. Thank you for your comment, this is a great question! The rule of thumb is to “and guest” the spouse, fiancé, or live-in significant other of each guest. That said, if you are in a long-term relationship and the bride neglects to “and guest” you, she most likely has a reason – space limitations, budget, etc. I know this can be terribly upsetting, but keep in mind that it’s her day and she’s not trying to hurt your feelings. In the event you don’t wish to attend the wedding solo, send her a beautiful gift and well wishes!