Ask B: Ghosting



Dear B, 

I attended several parties (dinner parties and cocktail parties) over the holidays, and ran into a slight dilemma – is it necessary to always say goodbye to the host? Sometimes the host seemed preoccupied with the guests, and other times I couldn’t find the host so I nabbed a final cake ball and left (oops!). Can you let me know what is the proper etiquette when leaving a party?


Ghosting Gal


Ghosting Gal,

I recently had a discussion about this – aka “ghosting” or the “french exit” with my friend Marisa (she has a fabulous lifestyle blog, Marhow, that you must read!), so your timing is spot on! Here’s the deal my darling, it’s best to say a brief farewell to the host or hostess, and kindly thank them for having you. Think of it this way – they’ve been a hospitable host by inviting you into their home (or at a beautiful venue no doubt) and offered you sips, snacks (perhaps a meal) and entertainment. If you slip out the door, they might be offended and wonder why oh why you didn’t say goodbye. As a gracious guest, it’s important to show your appreciation by saying a quick adieu, letting them know how much fun you had, and thanking them for the wonderful party. Finally, always pop a handwritten thank you note in the mail within two weeks of the event.


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